THOUGH IT WERE TEN THOUSAND MILES
Joan Stephens

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Prologue 

Catherine was going Above for the first time since Vincent’s almost fatal struggle with death and madness. Father had known this time would come once Vincent was completely healed, and she felt safe in leaving him. Paracelsus was no longer a threat and Vincent’s constant struggle with the Other was ended as they were now one. Leaning back in his comfortable, outdated desk chair, Father reflected on the past six cataclysmic months. How he and the tunnels survived was a wonder; how Vincent and Catherine survived was a miracle. The initial, crucial battle had been for his life, but the final bitter battle had been for his sanity.   

Catherine had not left his side since that dark night when Vincent, in fear and pain, had retreated to the depths of his world below the catacombs to face the madness that hovered around him. Father had tried to restrain her, but she was adamant in her belief that the tormented man needed her. Indeed, she left the old man with the impression that her life was worthless without the love of the man roaring out his pain and distress in the dark cave she was about to enter.   

Quickly shedding her coat as the lower caverns were quite warm, Catherine edged her way through the short dark entrance into the cave’s dimly lit interior. Barely able to see two feet in front of her, she located Vincent by following the sound of his anguished cries. Oh my love, she thought, how can I relieve your pain? The dim light brightened as she eased further into the cave, and he slowly became visible. Sweating profusely, he was battered, bruised, and bloodied, his beautiful hair in matted strings and clumps and his clothes hanging in rags from his magnificent body. Growling lowly, he flung himself again and again against the rocky walls, tearing off chunks of skin and ripping long gouges in his body. He whirled around when he heard her stumble over a rocky outcropping of the wall.   

“Vincent?” she whispered, afraid as she had never been afraid before. What if she couldn’t get through to him?

They could both die in this godforsaken hole. Not recognizing her, he sprang at her with an upraised taloned hand.  

She stood her ground, and as the deadly hand began its downward slash, she screamed his name, “Vincent!”  

He froze as a glimmer of recognition appeared in his eyes then they rolled up, and he crumpled at her feet, pulling her down with him. His arm lay heavily across her, and when she moved it to sit up, it was limp and lifeless. Crawling to his chest on bruised knees, she couldn’t find any sign of life. When she felt him leaving her, she used the most potent weapon at her command to pull him back from taking that final step over the edge into death: the siren call of her body.

Nothing was more important than saving his life, and she would do anything to accomplish that end.  She knew he wanted her as much as she wanted him; she knew this in the deepest part of her soul. That was part of the problem, that, and the use of the beast to keep her from harm. And it shamed her to think that she had been so careless of the shaky tightrope he walked to keep his mental balance. Never again would she endanger him.   

Flinging her clothes aside, she ground her breasts into his bloodied, naked chest, kissing him frantically, willing him back to her. Her hands were everywhere, soothing, rubbing, kneading, using their own magic to restore him to her. Hot tears fell heedlessly onto his still face as she pounded on his unmoving chest, crying, “No!Not without me! I won’t let you. You can’t leave me behind! I won’t let you! Do you hear me!?”  She shook him as hard as she could. Suddenly, she was angry .  .  .  angry that he would do this to himself .  .  .  to them, and she pulled her arm back in an unconscious imitation of him, ready to strike when he shuddered with an indrawn breath and murmured, “Cath .  .  .  rine?”  

The anger fled, replaced by joy. Shocked, she stared uncomprehendingly at her upraised hand for a few seconds.  

What had she been ready to do? Strike him? Weeping heavily, she dropped onto his breast, holding him closely to her, and begged him to forgive her. ” Oh, I’m sorry. Forgive me, forgive me. ”   

Vincent’s arms slowly came up around her and he realized that she was naked. Briefly, he wondered why, but there was no time for wondering, Catherine was unhappy; she needed him. ” Shhh,” he hoarsely whispered through a raw throat, “It’s .  .  .  all right .  .  .  I would .  .  .  forgive you .  .  .  anything. ” Swallowing painfully, he ran his hands up and down her bare back, thinking, It’s so soft and velvety. He couldn’t get enough of the feel of her, and his mind and body began to respond to her ministrations. The touch of her breasts against his chest banished the remaining irrational fog from his brain, and he started to think clearly once again. This was Catherine, this was the woman he loved, and she was on top of him completely nude. And as weary as he was, his body could no longer resist the call of her body.  

Maybe because he was so weary, he could no longer fight his desire.   

She became aware of the change in his breathing and the tension in his body. Raising her head from the cushion of his muscled chest, she looked deeply into his eyes. What she saw there and what she felt through the bond brought a shy smile to her lips. She lowered her mouth to his and kissed him with all the passion she had held in check for two and a half years.   

Afraid to move, afraid that this was merely another fever dream, he finally responded with passion of his own.  The fires ignited by that simple kiss could not be quenched until they were joined together as one.   

************************** 

The silence in the cave had driven Father to the breaking point, and he knew he couldn’t wait any longer. He took a torch and resolutely strode to the entrance of the chamber. Hesitating outside the portal, he feared the worst but he had to know. For good or ill, he had to know what had happened after Catherine’s frantic scream. The sight he encountered as he peered into the dim interior of the cave left him shocked and speechless: Vincent was naked, clutching an equally naked Catherine in his arms as he passionately kissed her. Their bodies were locked together, arms and legs entwined. Almost ready to shout, “No!” he paused, as understanding flooded through his stunned senses. Catherine had used the only option open to her in her fight for Vincent’s life. There was no better medicine than the call of one dearly beloved body to another. Father backed away, breathing a sigh of relief. His son was alive and Catherine was unharmed. Storing the memory of his son’s coming of age away in the back of his mind for future reflection, he returned to the fire that Mouse had kindled, more relieved than he had been in many months.  

************************* 

Now came the battle for Vincent’s soul and sanity. For the next month Catherine rarely left his side.  When she did, he would become highly agitated and only she could calm him. It seemed as if he was feeding on her nearness and would not survive without her. He needed to find her beside him whenever he awoke from his many moods. She never knew what Vincent’s mental state would be at any given moment. The change from one mood to another was lightning swift: calm but confused one minute; the next wildly violent, a danger to all except her.   

She had contemplated going Above to give Joe her resignation, but with Vincent’s reaction to her absence, she decided to send it through Peter Alcott. Peter reported that Joe was quite unhappy about her resignation but had reluctantly accepted it, saying that if she ever wanted to come back, she would be welcomed with open arms and no questions asked.   

After they had brought Vincent back to the comfort of his own bed, Father sutured and bandaged his wounds. The poor man was uncomfortable with what he had witnessed in the cave and ordered the distraught woman about rather brusquely. She would have wondered about it if not for the pressing need to care for the man she loved. Father berated himself for his attitude and mentally asked her forgiveness, knowing he would never openly admit to what he had seen. His softer tones caused her to look up and smile wearily at him. At that moment all reservations he had ever had about her relationship with his son were as insubstantial as the fog that dissipates with the morning sun and he dismissed them. He smiled back.   

In a gentler tone he asked, “Catherine, get some warm water and clean him up. I’ve done all I can. Now it’s up to you .  .  .  and him. ”   

“He will be fine, Father,” she stated. ” I’ll never let him go. He’s going to get well. ” Her assurance warmed his heart and he thought, Yes, my girl, if it is up to you, he will.

While she was gone to get the warm water, Vincent became quite agitated once more and only quieted when she sat beside him and began to wash his face, talking to him in a soothing voice. Without a struggle, he let her do anything with him. She removed the rags that partly covered his body and gently cleaned around the bandages. She took notice of his magnificent body, but this was no time for those thoughts, and she shoved them firmly to the back of her mind. When she was satisfied that he was clean, she roused him enough to put his nightshirt on him. Then she washed and brushed his hair, wishing that he was awake to enjoy this.   

This quiet time was the lull before the storm. As she was drowsing by his bed, he sat straight up, slashing at some enemy only he could see. Disregarding his lethal hands, she threw herself against his chest, telling him over and over that all was well. As suddenly as the outburst began, it ended, and he fell back in the pillows in a coma-like state.   

He woke in the midnight hours, frightened and crying like a child. Sitting in his bed, Catherine cradled him in her warm, comforting arms, rocking him and crooning her mother’s lullaby until he fell asleep, clutching her shirtfront for security. Just as her head droopedin sleep to rest on the top of his, he began to thrash around, and she had a tough time keeping him from throwing both of them out of bed. He muttered repeatedly, “Must not hurt her, must never hurt her. ”  

Then in a guttural, harsh voice, he uttered forcefully, “I won’t let you hurt her!” Even in his delirious condition, he was still protecting her. His rage suddenly evaporated; he glanced around the room in confusion, wondering where and who he was. She patiently explained to him that he was in his chamber and told him his name. Repeating it wonderingly, he lapsed into a deep, unnatural sleep only to waken into a deep depression and withdrawal, wanting no one--not even her--near him as he wrestled with his demons. Honoring his need to be alone, she retreated as far as the shadows but no further, unable to leave him alone. Curling into a fetal ball, he would silently weep until he fell asleep. Then she would creep forward to sit by his bed, holding his hand until he awoke. Each time she hoped that he would be rational but it was a vain hope.   

Day after day, Vincent and Catherine fought for his sanity as he slipped from emotion to emotion. In his lucid moments he begged her to leave him; that with him she was not safe. She repeated to him the words he had said.  “Even now, Vincent,” she assured him, “you can’t harm me. ”   

“Catherine, I am so sorry to put you through this,” he said unhappily as he pulled her down beside him.   

Quietly she answered, soothing his hot brow with her cool hand, “Don’t worry, my love, you’ll soon be well. You have to; I won’t entertain a single negative thought. Got that, Mister?” She poked him gently in the chest with one small, slender finger, hoping to bring a smile to his solemn face.   

“Yes, Catherine,” he answered meekly with a deep sigh. Barely able to keep his eyes open, he said, 

“I’m tired now. I want to sleep. ” Closing his eyes, he was instantly back in that unnatural sleep only now he couldn’t wake from the terrible nightmares that gripped him. He lingered in this dream state for a full week. From the emotions that passed over his expressive face, she and Father could tell that he was lost in some dream world where she was lost to him. He searched constantly for her, calling her name, begging her to call out to him. Then there was a period of intense sorrow, and Catherine wondered if in his dream she had died. He wept uncontrollably for long periods of time, then spoke her name, and became strangely calm.   

“Father, we’re losing him. He thinks he’s lost me. Oh god, what do we do now?”  

Quickly Father assessed the condition of his son. His vital signs were deteriorating. ” Catherine,call to him. Keep a tight hold on his hand. Don’t let go. Use your love to bring him back. ”   

She was instantly beside the motionless body of the man she loved, urging him to awake, kissing his unresponsive lips, his cheeks, his eyes, and his hands. She poured all her love into his ear, fervidly telling him, “I’m here, love; I’ve always been here. I’ll never leave you. Don’t leave me, Vincent. Not now. ”   

An intense shudder passed through his body as he inhaled deeply. ” Catherine?” he mumbled. He stared at her as if she was an apparition.   

Quickly she gave him a drink of cool water. Water had never tasted as good as that she gave him. Really seeing her for the first time, he asked, “Are you real or are you a ghost?”  

Bending over him, she lightly grazed his lips with a kiss. ” Does that feel like a ghost?” she asked.    

“No,” he breathed.  Carefully, she rested on his breast, giving him the feeling of her warm and living body. ” Ah Catherine, I thought I had lost you. ” He ran his hands over her, assuring himself that she was real.   

“Never, my love. Never!  You’re stuck with me forever. ” She reached up and kissed him, looking into clear and lucid eyes. The worst was over.   

Turning his head, he glanced around the room, feeling as if he was finally home. He saw Father hovering at the foot of his bed. ” Father,” he said, raising a weak hand to him.   

“Oh my boy, you’re back. Thank god. ” He clasped the hand extended to him, relief almost making him weak. With tears slowly coursing down his cheeks, he bent down painfully and kissed his fully recovered son on the forehead. ” Welcome back, son. Welcome back. ”   

“How long?”  

“Oh, give or take a few days, about three weeks. And Catherine has been here all that time.” Father patted her on the shoulder. ” She’s been a great help, a great help indeed. ”  

Clasping her hands, the convalescent said, “I was aware that you were here, but I couldn’t break through the shadows to get to you. ”   

“Well, you’re here now. That’s all that matters. Now you need to get your strength back. ” 

“I’m sure William will be more than glad to assist in that,” Father chimed in.   

Weakly, Vincent chuckled, nodding his head as his eyes began to droop.   

“Rest, my son. We’ll be here when you awake. ”   

He drifted into the first natural sleep in almost a month.   

Vincent was not the most cooperative of patients. Even his accelerated healing was not fast enough for him. Catherine had thought that nothing could be worse than dealing with his emotional crisis until she had to cope with a restless, testy, almost well Vincent. She racked her brain to keep him entertained and occupied until finally she threw up her hands and marched away to get Father to put Vincent in his place. A stern lecture kept him quiet for a couple of days, and then he was as restless as ever. Finally Father told him to do as he pleased; he would anyway. Vincent was promptly out of bed and wobbling across the floor to fall into his chair. After that he walked a little more each day and slowly grew stronger until there was only the fear of the Other to torment him.  

***********************  

Deep in her heart, Catherine felt he would never be completely healed until he had made peace with the darkness that lived within him. Whether it was a separate entity as Vincent thought or only a personification of repressed emotions didn’t matter to her. The fact was that he could not continue on in this manner. Against Father’s better judgment, she took Vincent back to that grim cave where he called forth the Other.   

Feeling small and vulnerable beside him, she asked the Other, “How can I convince you that the best course for you is to accept Vincent and become an integral part of him?”  

Towering over her in all his dark, intimidating magnificence, the Other curled his lip and snarled, “Why should I?I like things the way they are. I control my destiny, not him. ”   

“If you continue this way, you will drive him to kill himself, and I can’t let you do that. ”  

“You can’t let me?” he laughed, amazed at her audacity. ” And just what makes you think you could stop me?” he sneered. Growling, the Other shook a clawed hand in front of her eyes. ” Little girl, I could end your life with a flick of my wrist. ”  

Undaunted with the love she felt for this divided man, she responded, “I know that. ” Her green eyes bored into his midnight blue orbs with absolute conviction as she continued, “But you won’t do that. ”   

Exactly like Vincent, he tilted his head to the side with a crafty smile. ” Oh?And just how do you know that?”  

“You love me. ” The confidence in her voice irritated his still raw nerves from his struggle with the Man for their sanity. No one understood him, least of all the Man. He thought the mindless killing rages emanated from the dark side alone; whereas, they came from both sides of him. Unbeknownst to the Man, when he needed to protect his family, the Other turned to him for guidance, and it was only when she was in danger that the Man lost control. Believing that the only way to be free of the Other was to tear that part out of him, the Man had retreated to an obscure cavern where he fought the Other to kill that part of him. If not for the woman, the Other would have lost the battle, and the Man would have died and he with him. He was so glad that she had come to save them and he loved her beyond reason.   

“I do?” he sneered. 

“Yes,” she replied with certainty. ” You won’t let any harm come to me. ”   

His fierce scowl melted into a self-deprecatory half-smile. ” No, I won’t let anyone harm you,” he agreed, looking away from her knowing smile.   

“And, Vincent .  .  . ” His head snapped up in shock. No one ever called him anything but ‘The Beast’ or the ‘Other. ’But she knew; she knew how much he yearned for acceptance and love, and to hear his name spoken with her lovely voice brought the light of her love into his lonely, unhappy heart. She reached up to place a loving palm against his stubbly cheek. ” I love you, too. ”  

Confused, he shook her hand away. ” How can you say that? You love the man. ”   

“Of course I do but don’t you see, Vincent? You are he and he is you. Somehow .  .  .  I don’t know how,” she shook her head in puzzlement, “you became separated from him. Apart neither one of you is whole, but together you will both share in the wonders of life. ”   

Shyly, he asked, “The wonders of love?”  

Laughing gently, she agreed, “Oh yes, that too. ”   

“What of the Man?   Will he agree?”  

“I think so, but he is afraid. ”   

“Of what? He has everything; I have nothing but the darkness and the blood. And the loneliness. ”   

“He is afraid he will lose his identity. ”  

“He is?”  

“Yes. And I think you are too. ”   

He started to deny her words but couldn’t. ” Yes. ” This simple word held all his fear and doubt.  

 

Pacing in front of him, her hands jammed into her jeans pockets, she tried to reassure him, “Will you lose your identity? I can’t answer that for either of you, but maybe the individual you become will be all that you wish to be. ”  

 

Gathering this unhappy, lonely part of the man she loved into her arms, she crooned, “Ah Vincent,
 

don’t you see? If you join with him, you won’t be lonely anymore. You won’t be separate. Every minute of every day, you will be right there enjoying every part of his and your life, not off in some dark corner of his mind. ”  

 

After thinking over her words for a few minutes, he slowly nodded his head. ” All right, I will do it. But the Man must agree first. ”  

 

“Of course, it can be no other way. ”  

 

After a subtle change in body language, Vincent, the man, stood before her

 

“You heard?”

 

“Yes, and he can hear me. ”  

 

“Will you ally yourself with him?” This question was necessary to assure the Other that Vincent was willing.  

 

“He must promise one thing: never to hurt you. ”  

 

“He never will, Vincent. Believe me! He is a part of you and he loves me too. ”  

 

Turning his gaze inward, he waited for an answer. Abruptly, he nodded once and his gaze returned to her. ” Ask the question again?”

 

“Will both of you accept the other?”

 

Two voices, one overlaying the other, answered: one with Vincent’s soft gravel and silk voice and the other harsher but still his voice, “Yes. ”   

“Do I need to leave .  .  .  give you some privacy?” She was unsure of what to do now that the time had arrived for this important reunification.   

“No, just give me a moment. I need you here with me. ” He closed his eyes, still as a statue. As she watched in fascination, she noted what she had come to call ‘the aspect of the Other’ pass over his unique face. There was a small shiver then the unnatural stillness once again which instantly evaporated. His eyes snapped open and he grinned fully at her. Something she had never seen before.   

“Vincent?”  

“Yes, from both of us. We are finally one, my love. ” Tenderly he stroked her cheek, but there was a look in his eyes she had never seen: blatant sexuality.   

Sucking in a deep breath, she grinned back at him. ” Wonderful. I was so afraid I couldn’t convince you. ”   

“It was time, Catherine, past time to become one again. The strain of maintaining two separate identities was becoming intolerable. Eventually, there would have been another period of madness: one that I would not survive. ”   

“When did it happen, Vincent? The separation. ”   

“I think it started when I was a very young child and began to notice that I was different from the other children. That even in their anger they could not inflict the kind of pain that I could. Father reenforced this idea by repeatedly telling me I had to learn to curb my more violent emotions. It has been a constant struggle ever since. ”   

“Well, it’s over. You are whole once more. ”   

“Yes, all due to you. ” Confidently, he pulled her into his arms and bent to kiss her. ” Thank you, my love. ”   

“You are entirely welcome,” she responded.  

*********************** 

Waiting anxiously, Father wanted nothing more than to pace as Vincent was so want to do when he was nervous or upset, but the knifelike pains in his hip prohibited him from doing that. The stress of the past few months had aggravated the tenderness of his arthritic hip. Just as he was about to give in regardless of the pain, Catherine and Vincent’s laughter preceded them into the library.  

“Vincent,” Father enclosed his newly restored son in a fierce hug. ” Are you all right?” he asked anxiously.   

“I’m fine, Father, really. ”   

“And the Other?”  

“Still here but part of me as he always should have been. There will be no more dark times. ”  

“Well .  .  .  It was a terrible risk you took, Catherine. It could have been disastrous. ”   

“It was a risk worth taking if it would restore Vincent to his natural state,” she answered, gazing up at Vincent with love and relief.   

“Humph!I’m glad it all worked out fine, Catherine; you were right and I thank you. ”   

“I have to confess that I wasn’t as sure of myself as I seemed. It all depended on the two of them. Thank god, they were ready.  

Nodding slowly, Father rubbed his hands together as if he was washing his hands of all the problems of the last six months. ” Well, maybe now we can get back to living a relatively normal life. ”   

“That would be nice,” Catherine commented.   

Silently, Vincent agreed.  

***************************

From that time on Vincent’s recovery was both rapid and total and, with his recovery, came the painful confrontations of his fears and doubts as well as hers. True to his belief that she could only be happy if she lived Above, he urged her to return to her life in that world. For a man who professed to feel what she felt, he was remarkably obtuse when it came to understanding how much he hurt her by not believing that she wanted to be with him. Catherine adamantly refused to return to the world Above. She tried to convince him of her need to remain here with him, that she could only be happy by his side. Their discussion deteriorated into their first quarrel.   

They were sitting together on his bed alternately reading from Leaves of Grass when he cleared his throat. With his heart breaking, he spoke the dreaded words, “Catherine, you know how much I love having you here with me?”  

Catherine tensed, Oh god, he wasn’t, was he?” But .  .  .  ?”  

With a deprecatory chuckle, he replied, “You know me so well. But don’t you think it is time for you to return to your life Above?”  

Shocked and hurt, she stared at him through wide, dismayed eyes, “You can’t mean that. After all that we have suffered?”  

Uncomfortable as he felt her hurt and dismay flood from the bond he, nevertheless, said, “But I do. I will miss our time together, but I can no longer keep you from your life Above. I am able to take care of myself now. ”   

“So! .  .  .  I can stay here when you need me, but when you don’t, you banish me to the world above. ”   

“Now, Catherine that is not what I mean,” he complained. ” You are misconstruing my words. ” 

“What else am I to think?”  

“I could ask for nothing more than to have you remain here in the tunnels with us. ”   

“And I want to stay with you,” she stated firmly.   

“But what of your friends and the good you can do Above. Your job. The sunshine .  .  .  when you have no further need to care for me. ”   

“Just how shallow do you think I am,” she hissed.   

He was doing this badly; he knew, but he had to convince her to return Above. ” I don’t think you are shallow at all. ”   

“But you don’t think I can handle living here in the tunnels. ”  

“Be reasonable, Catherine. You need the sun, your friends, your job, your world. ”   

“I need you,” she pleaded.   

“And I need you but you have so much to give to your world. ”   

“What about your world?”  

“Your world has the greater need. ”   

Bounding off the bed, she stared at him, her green eyes sparking with anger and determination. ” Well, Vincent, I don’t want to go and I’m not going to leave. My friends will get along fine without me and who says they have to do without me, anyway? There is a great deal down here to keep me occupied, and as for my job I don’t have one anymore. I resigned. It was that or lose it anyway; I would be away to long. ” She stubbornly refused to give in. ” My place is here with you. ”   

“You quit your job without telling me?” He was astounded that she would do that and not ask his opinion.   

“You weren’t in the best shape at the time I resigned,” she answered bitingly.   

“How could you?”  

“As easily as you decide where I should live my life,” her flat voice informed him. ” Vincent, I’m tired and I can see this conversation is getting us nowhere. ” She was so angry with him that she was beginning to cry, and she left him staring at her retreating back in consternation.   

In the guest chamber she threw herself on the bed, crying. Why was he so stubborn?Why couldn’t she get through to him? If this situation wasn’t resolved, it could very well lead to their separation. The simple fact that she didn’t know was that despite all the evidence he just couldn’t accept that she loved him as much as he loved her.   

It took a week of constant comments by the tunnel folk about Catherine’s sudden unhappiness, her inflexible refusal to go back Above, plus Father’s timely intervention that finally convinced Vincent that she meant to stay with him because she loved him. Vincent had come to his father for consolation and support. Father would surely agree with him he thought, but he was in for the shock of his life.   

Slouched in his chair, Vincent offered his reasons for telling Catherine she should return Above.  Listening to his son’s rationalizations, Father had had enough. ” I’ve heard all this before,” he said with thinly veiled impatience. ” You’re just being selfish. ”   

“Selfish!?”His dismayed son stared at the older man in shock. ” How can you say that?   I am only thinking of Catherine. ”   

Father speared him with a penetrating look. ” Are you, my son? Are you really?”  

“Of course, I .  .  .  am. ”  His voice trailed away to a whisper.   

Shaking his head, Father disagreed, “No, you are not. It’s probably my fault for constantly casting doubt on your relationship with her, but I think you are afraid to take the next step. You’re afraid she will regret coming Below someday. Well, I’ve come to realize that is something that will never happen. She will never leave you, my boy. ”   

“But, Father .  .  . ”   

“I know, I know. I’ve changed my mind, that’s all. At my age, I’m entitled. ”   

Straightening with hope, Vincent asked, “You really think so, Father. ”   

“Yes I do, son. She has built her life around you, and if you do not accept her vision of your life together, you may very well lose her.  You need each other, even I can see that. Neither one of you would have a life without the other.  

Don’t let her slip away, Vincent. ”   

As a humble supplicant Vincent approached his unhappy love in her chamber. She hadn’t come near him in seven days and he missed her dearly. When she met him in a tunnel or chamber, she was overly polite and unresponsive to the pleas for understanding that he sent her through his eyes and the bond. ” Catherine?” he asked as he stood outside the chamber entrance. ” May I come in?”  

“Of course,” she answered civilly. She was sitting on her bed, trying to repair a tear in one of her shirts. Rather poorly too, she thought.   

Coming into her presence when she was so angry with him was the most difficult, disconcerting, and humbling thing he had ever done. If not for the sure knowledge that she still loved him, he doubted if he would have had the courage to step into her chamber.   

“If you’ve come to urge me to return to my ‘golden’ life Above, you can save your breath. ” Her sarcastic use of the word told him what she thought of her life in the world Above. Tossing her hair back over her shoulder, she defiantly gazed at him. Even in her anger, he was overcome with her beauty.    

With a little shake of his head, he said, “No, Catherine, I cannot live with your anger anymore. I need your love; I cannot bear the wall between us that I have erected. Please know that it was only my fear speaking and not my heart.  

I’m sorry I hurt you. ”   

She nodded slightly, accepting his apology. ” Then.  .  .  ?”She waited for him to say the words of welcome, breathing a silent sigh of relief. She didn’t know how much longer she could have stayed mad at him.   

“Then?”She had confused him; he thought that all he had to do was to apologize and everything would be all right.   

“I have my needs too, Vincent. I need you to ask me to stay. ”  

“Please, Catherine, stay Below. ”   

“And.  .  .  ?”  

“Uh .  .  . ” He looked at her helplessly, not knowing what she wanted him to say. For some reason, she was withholding her thoughts from him. With a smile, she urged him on. As his face lit up like a lightbulb, he knew what she wanted. ” With me. ” Opening his arms to her, he was rocked back on his heels as she threw herself against his chest.   

Her intense joy and relief flooded through him, and dismayed, he realized her greatest fear had been that he would leave her or send her away. He’d had no idea that she was literally walking on eggshells around him until this last confrontation, afraid to let him know her deepest feelings, afraid that the strength of those feelings would drive him away from her. Finally, comprehending with a shudder how easily it could kill her if he did, he vowed that he would never bring up the subject again.   

Happily they settled into making one life out of two. Catherine radiated happiness, making everyone smile when they met her bouncing through the tunnels or humming as she worked. As for Vincent he was walking on clouds; his dreams were all coming true. His chamber became their chamber; his bed, their bed. Quietly, the love of his life moved what she needed or wanted from her apartment to the chamber she now called home. Vincent treasured the signs of her presence that were everywhere: her books, her journal, her slippers beside his bed, the easy way she appropriated one of his shirts to wear as a nightgown. Her hairbrush rested next to his on the antique dressing table that Cullen had resurrected and presented to her. Her unmentionables lay next to his in their chest of drawers. And the pleasure that Catherine received rifling through her clothes hanging next to his as she accidentally brushed a hand over his shirts or cloak was beyond description. They finally had their happy life.  

And now she was going Above.