CHAPTER THREE

LIKE MADNESS IN THE BRAIN

I almost jumped out of my bed. What kept me from doing so was myfather blocking my path. I made myself sit up slowly.

"Where is she?" I asked.

"In Grandfather's chambers."

I nodded and with equally deliberate slowness left my bed. As Iput on my jeans and a shirt, I said, "How long has she beenthere?"

"For a few minutes."

"When did she arrive?"

"Just a few minutes before that."

I looked at Father. "Why didn't you wake me up the moment shearrived?"

"Because she did not ask for you. In fact, she hasn't saidanything. She just entered the Tunnels and proceeded to Grandfather'schambers."

"What do you mean, 'she just entered?'"

"I mean, she already knew where to find an entrance and how toopen it. Jamie was beside herself."

I smiled slightly. "I can imagine."

"Fortunately, she realized that this intruder was Alexandra."Father shook his head. "Alexandra never asked for directions. Shenavigated the tunnels as if she grew up in them. This is what hergift can do?"

"Yep." I slid my feet into my boots, then looked at Father."Okay..."

He nodded. We headed for Grandfather's chambers. I moved at anunhurried pace, but my forehead had warmed. I developed a twitch inmy right hand. I don't know how I would have behaved if Father hadn'tbeen walking at my side, keeping me centered.

Just before we reached Grandfather's chambers, he lingered behindme. I understood why. Father was always hesitant about revealinghimself to strangers. I took the final few steps alone.

I entered the chambers.

She was there.

So was everybody else.

Grandfather was sitting at a table and scratching his moustache.Jamie stood above him on the second level with a crossbow over hershoulder and a suspicious look on her face. Mouse situated himselfnear one of the bookshelves and watched the newcomer with hisinquisitive eyes. Pascal had torn himself away from the Pipe Chamberto be here.

And there were Memory-Guardians and Life-Givers and Protectorsaway from their galleries and gardens and guardposts. And there wereparents with their children. Despite the largeness of Father'schambers, there was not much room left for anybody else.

They were all looking at the one young lady sitting in a chairacross from Grandfather. She sat with her back perfectly flat againstthe chair, her hands folded in her lap and her shoes pointed straightahead. She didn't seem to be breathing. And she was dressed all inblack, including the scarves and glasses disguising her face.

When I entered the room, everybody shifted their attention to me,except for her. At least, I don't think she was looking at me. Herhead wasn't aligned in my direction.

Grandfather and the Dwellers watched me as I knelt on the groundbefore her. She remained immobile.

"Alexandra?"

No reply.

I cleared my throat and said, "I'm glad you came."

Nothing.

"This is my home. Or Grandfather's home. His chambers. You knowwhat I mean." I indicated the others. "And this is my family. They'vebeen waiting to see you." I coughed. "Well, obviously."

She remained as silent as her clothes were dark. I reached for thehood of her cloak, saying, "You don't have to..."

She raised a hand and blocked me from touching her cloak.

This was a mistake, I thought. And I knew she was thinking thesame thing. What had we expected to happen? To fall into each other'sarms? To forget the past? To ignore why she was here? I had no doubtthat she knew about my meeting with her father. She sat before me asheir to a throne built on blood. I knelt before her as a fool whothought that love could redeem everything.

Then I heard, "Hello, Alexandra."

I turned to see Father enter the room. His face was gentle andwarm like his greeting.

I quickly looked back at Alexandra. She was finally gazingstraight at another person in the room -- my father. She had knownwhat he looked like. The High Tower had gathered such informationthrough their intelligence services. However, a photograph doesn'tprepare you for my father's presence.

"Please," he said as he walked respectfully toward her. "Allowme." He placed hands that could shred flesh onto her hood. She didnot stop him as he pulled the hood down to her shoulders. With equalcare he removed her dark glasses and placed them on the table. Thosewho could see her red eyes held their breath.

Then he unwrapped the scarves from her face. Bit by bit her greenscales were shown to the Dwellers. Children whispered in amazement.Some people took a step backward. Grandfather shifted his chair.Mouse's eyes widened. Jamie touched her crossbow.

Finally her face was there for all to see. The expression on thathalf-human, half-snake head was unreadable. Was she frightened? Wasshe angry? She kept her eyes on Vincent and her white lipsclosed.

Father studied her face for a long time as the scarves dangledfrom his fingers. Then he said --

"I'm sorry."

Alexandra tilted her head slightly to the right. Her expressionwas now puzzled.

"I'm sorry that I was more fortunate than you. We both found ourway to places that could protect us, but I received the better home.You should have been raised here. This -- " He indicated thechambers. "-- is where you should have spent your childhood. Youwould have had more than walls to hide you."

He touched her on the cheek. She did not flinch. "You would havehad friends and family. You would have had care as well asprotection." He lowered his hand. "I'm not being presumptuous when Isay the Tower has not given you those things."

"At least I can get cable."

Those were the first words Alexandra spoke in the Tunnels. Theabrupt sound after all of her silence was jarring. Everybody lookedat somebody else and all eyes were asking the same question -- 'Didshe just tell a joke?'

Father knew. He laughed a low, appreciative chuckle. Mouse was thesecond to laugh, followed by Grandfather. The laughter spread throughthe room. It was a nervous yet grateful sound.

"No," Father said. "We don't have television down here."

"Why not?" a young boy asked. And the laughter became stronger andsurer. Just as it was settling down, Father held out a hand toAlexandra. She accepted it graciously and stood up.

"Everyone," Father said, "this is Alexandra. She is the love of myson's heart and a new member to our family. Please welcome her."

Grandfather walked over to Alexandra with his hand extended. "I amJacob's Grandfather. You may call me Father."

Mouse strode forward with his hand waving. "I'm Mouse," hechirped.

She shook hands with them, as she shook hands with Jamie, Pascaland everyone. She didn't need to be told their names. Her talents hadalready revealed them to her mind's eye, but she appreciated eachname-giving as a special little gift.

At one point a small girl asked softly, "Can I...?" She held ahand toward Alexandra's face.

"Of course," Alexandra answered. The little girl ran her tenderhand over Alexandra's hairless scaly head. Then every child wanted totouch her, and every child did. The Dwellers moved closer, forming atight circle around her, bringing her into their group, accepting heras she had never been accepted before.

And I thought, goddamn, I love these people.

XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX

Then I was alone with her. I had just spent the day guiding herthrough the Tunnels. Of course, she already had a map of myunderground world in her mind, but I showed her something that hergift could not. I could tell her which books in the library were myfavorites and why. I could teach her the songs heard in the Chamberof the Winds. I could show her the spots on the pipes where thevibrations were the strongest. I could explain how I had felt thefirst time I saw a funeral in the Whispering Gallery. I could bringher to the favorite alcoves and caves of my youth, and point at thewords I had carved on the walls. I could share her admiration for thebeauty of the Falls.

She knew where to find a place. I could show her its soul.

I never touched her as I guided her through the tunnels. Once Ireached out to help her across two banks in a tunnel. Without myassistance, she just nimbly jumped to my side. She never tripped overa bump or slipped on a damp spot. I had spent my youth gettingbruised by hidden imperfections in the Tunnels. She saw everypotential for an accident coming. She didn't need my helpinghand.

But we were lovers, were we not? Shouldn't we have found an excuseto touch after two months of separation? However, we had hardlytouched each other during the three days when we had first met.That's how it was in the first hours of our reunion. As we walkedthrough the Tunnels, she would often pat the head of a passing child,but she never touched me.

Maybe I could say it was a love that transcended the physical, butI think that's crap. I like the physical side, thank you very much.Perhaps we were just being cautious. Our love had been born in afragile situation. Who knew what could have sent it falling down?

In any case, we stayed close to each other, but also apart. We sawmany Dwellers who were busy at some task or heading to another partof the Tunnels. They were always friendly. Alexandra particularlyfascinated the children. Even in a place occupied by my father, theyoung remained drawn by the mysterious and the different.

We finally reached the end of my guided tour. The hour was sevenP.M. We were in my chambers, just the two of us. The curtain wasdrawn over the entrance. We were seated on my bed.

Alexandra looked at the posters on my walls. I looked at her.

"I should have come here sooner," she said.

"What matters is that you came."

"Your people are very kind."

"They're the best."

"How much do they know about me?"

"Well...they know about the High Tower..."

"No. Not the Tower. About me. Do they know about Crown?"

I turned my eyes to a wall. "They know he killed Joe Maxwell. Andthat you killed him. You're not going to find many objections to thataround here."

"They are a peaceful people."

"Oh, trust me, I've seen them get their back up many times."

"You know what I mean."

I paused, then said, "Yeah."

Alexandra asked, "Do they know about Masilela?"

I looked back at her. Those red eyes were now gazing at me -- notas an accusation, but calmly.

Well, I had been expecting this. "Father knows. I mean, Vincentknows. And Grandfather knows."

"And so do you."

I nodded.

"You want to know why I pushed for the assassination. So does myfather."

I leaned back until my shoulders touched a pillow. One of my feetstill rested on the floor. I watched Alexandra from my prone positionand waited for more.

When she gave no answer, I said, "Well? Why did you?"

"You have already been given two possibilities. One is thatMasilela would have eventually threatened the Tower. The other isthat I was avenging those who had been wronged by his actions andinfluence."

"So which is it?"

"Let me ask you a question -- do you think the two possibilitiesare incompatible?"

I was genuinely surprised by that question. "Uh, no. I haven'tconsidered that."

"Perhaps I was punishing Masilela for his crimes, but that doesn'tmean he was not the possible threat I described."

"Okay. All right. But that doesn't mean he was, either."

"He would have been. I foresaw it."

"Your father said..." I paused, as if I had tainted the room bymentioning him. "He said you didn't explain how."

"I didn't have to. I am Alexandra Bradbury."

I sat up quickly and now our faces were a few inches apart. "I'mnot one of the Nobles. Explain it to me."

Alexandra was silent at first, but not because I intimidated her.She spent those quiet moments in contemplation of my face. Then shesaid --

"I will."

She laid out the future to me -- the coming twists and turns inAfrican politics, the rise of Baba Industries, the increasing numberof politicians in Masilela's pocket. Eventually his influence wouldhave reached the secluded corners of the High Tower's domain. Theywould not have been able to keep him out, nor would have they beenable to make a deal without compromising themselves. By theirstandards he had to die.

Alexandra's explanation was too long and complex to be transcribedhere, but it was convincing. After she was done, I said, "I buy it.The Nobles certainly would have bought it. So why didn't you tellthem?"

"I told you. I'm..."

"Yeah, I know. You're Alexandra Bradbury. So you were just doingsome territorial pissing."

"Something like that." Then she touched me. For the first time intwo months, her hand touched my hand. She was wearing her gloves, butI could feel the warmth of her skin.

"I had to be sure that the Nobles were still afraid of me. Thatfear, after all, is the reason why you're here and not working forthe Tower."

I gave myself over to a brief moment of elation. It wasn't justthe touch. Alexandra had given me what I had needed. As long as theNobles knew that she was still playing by their rules, she was safe.I wanted to hold her, kiss her, lie upon the bed with her...

Then the elation was thwarted by a cold question in my mind. I hadto ask it.

"Did Masilela have to die?"

Alexandra did not withdraw her hand. She looked me in the eye andsaid, "Did Gabriel have to die?"

"That's...that's different. It was the only way to stop him."

"To stop him from abducting you and killing your father, you mean.As long as Masilela lived, there would have been countless deaths. Dothose lives mean any less than yours?"

"Of course not. But...look, Alexandra, I've played the vigilantebefore..."

"I'm not just talking about the ones who would have died becauseof Masilela's greed. I'm talking about the ones caught in the warbetween him and the Tower."

"War?"

She tightened her grip on my hand, just a little bit. "Do not tellmy father this -- but if the Tower had not killed Masilela now, itwould have to kill thousands in the future. He would have grown thatpowerful. And the Tower would have become something much more than ahidden shelter for the powerful. It would have become an outrightforce for tyranny."

"You mean, the very thing the Nobles insist they're not."

"And they are not. Not exactly. But, Jacob, do you really thinkthey hold onto their power simply as a means to protectthemselves?"

I snorted. "Hell, no."

"My father has told you the story of how he was playing in anunderground shelter while the world trembled at the edge of nuclearwar. However, what he hasn't told you is that there have beeninstances when the Tower has intervened in world affairs. Secretlyand only on occasion, but the Tower does this when events areovercoming their ability to retreat -- when they have to protectothers in order to save themselves."

"So they would put aside their philosophy to cover theirasses."

"Fear of sudden violent death is their philosophy. They hold inthemselves the possibility to become the rulers of the world -- ifonly to keep the world from harming them. They are in denial of this.So is my father. That's why I must ask you to keep this part of ourconversation a secret."

I slowly nodded, then reached over and touched her hand. We werestarting to look like any other couple -- sort of.

"Look," I said, "maybe you're right. Maybe Masilela had to die,just like Gabriel. Everything I've heard tells me that the world willnot miss him. But you're playing with forces that..."

"I never play, Jacob. You should know that."

"Then why didn't you prove to your father that Masilela was goingto become too powerful, just like you did for me?"

"I was testing his respect for me, just like with the Nobles. AndI knew he would likely go to you for help -- that he would arrangefor this very meeting."

I became very conscious of how close we were, how near her fullwhite lips were to my mouth. "So," I whispered, "was it all just ameans of coming here?"

"No," she whispered back. "But here we are."

So much for transcending the physical. So much for my doubts aboutAlexandra. So much for the Tower, Edward Bradbury and everythingelse. I only knew what was going on in this blinding moment.Alexandra and I started to move across that final separatinginch...

And, yes, we were interrupted. Fucking-A.

"Jacob!" the intruder yelled as he pushed aside the curtain.Alexandra and I quickly turned to him with our bodies almosttouching. His agitated look turned to a big ol' slab ofembarrassment. Alexandra's face became blank and unreadable again. Ican only imagine my expression. I was about to yell "Scram!" when Isaw that the intruder was Gareth. Gareth was a Protector. He watchedentrances for invaders. If he ran from his post for me, then...

I leapt to my feet. "What is it?"

He looked at me, then at Alexandra, then back at me.

"Gareth, what is it?"

"Um, Jamie needs you to come to the Southeast entrance, LevelThree."

"What for?"

"There's somebody waiting outside there. She hasn't found theentrance, but she's calling for you."

"Who is..."

That's when I hit my forehead. I had completely forgottensomething.

"Shit," I commented, then turned to Alexandra. "I...I haveto..."

Alexandra had resumed her firm, distant pose -- hands in her lap,back straight. She nodded slightly to me.

I moved like hell, but even a second's time would have been toolong for Jamie. There were two things about Jamie that you didn'tfuck with -- Mouse and the security of the Tunnels. When I reachedthe right entrance, she greeted me in the surveillance alcove with ahissed "You mind explaining this to me?" She jabbed her thumb at aslot in the wall. Protectors used it to observe unseen anyone at theentrance.

I looked through the slot and saw Layla Mubarak standing in thetunnel next to the closed secret entrance. Judging from her tappingfoot, she had been underground Central Park for some time andwondering if anybody was going to come.

"Show yourself!" she yelled. "What the hell is with you,Jacob?!"

"Funny," Jamie said in a hot whisper. "I've been asking the samething."

What to do, then? Well, a promise is still a promise, no matter ifyou are an ass.

"It's fine," I whispered to Jamie. "Let her in."

"Jacob, this is the same woman who held a..."

"I know who she is. But she's with me now."

"I don't care if she's with fucking Amnesty International. Wecan't just let people in without getting cleared by Father!"

"Please. This is the right thing. She used to work for Joe."

"I don't know her."

"I do."

"I'm WAIT-ing!" Layla hollered.

"It's a little too much to explain right now, but that woman hasto know about us. She's entitled to know."

"So we just let her in and show her the whole kit and caboodle?Including Vincent?"

"Look, one way or another, this is not the last you're going tosee of her..."

"ALLEY-ALLEY-OXEN-FREE!" went the echo in the adjoiningtunnel.

"Or hear of her. Besides, I'm the one she threatened with a knife.How come I can trust her and you can't?"

"That is a great mystery of our times." She gave me one of thelongest sighs I've ever heard. "Okay. But I'm going to keep at herside."

"No."

"Jacob..."

"You'll make her nervous. You're making me nervous."

"I should hope so."

"I'm the only one here who is not a stranger to her. I can handleher. Just get everybody to back off. Clear a path to theLibrary."

Jamie closed her eyes. She kept them closed until Layla bawled"Daylight come and I wanna go HOME."

"Very well," she muttered. "At least I can get her to shut up."She took out a wrench from her coat pocket and tapped a message onone of the pipes. She got a response that her order would be carriedout. Before she left, she informed me, "This goes sour and a hardrain's gonna fall on your damn head."

After she left me alone I spent a moment wondering how Vincentraised a dummy. Then I pulled a lever, and a wall moved to oneside.

XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX

Whenever newcomers first saw the Tunnels, they were usuallyimpressed by two things -- 1) The very fact that there had been acommunity hidden under New York City for so long and 2) we lookedmore like something out of The Hobbit than C.H.U.D. Not to say thatthe Dwellers were the cleanest bunch you would ever meet, but we woreour rags and anachronistic clothing with flair. Then there were allthe beautiful candle-lit corners of our world to discover. We weren'thomeless; we had an actual home.

When I showed Layla the Tunnels, her reaction wasn't differentthan other newbies. Her eyeballs bulged when we entered the Library.She stared at the exquisite homemade furniture and tall woodenshelves full of leather-bound books. The candles flickered around herpretty, startled face.

"Jesus..." she said.

"That's kind of what Joe said when he first came here."

She looked straight at me. "Joe knew about this place?"

"For over ten years."

She looked away from me and shook her head.

"He never gave any hints about us?"

"Well...now that I look back and I can remember...little things.Times where I didn't know where he was. And information he got fromsources he never revealed. But I never imagined..."

Her voice trailed off as she pressed her fingers against one ofthe books.

"How long were you involved with Joe?"

"A little over a year."

"Well, we're kind of reluctant about letting others know about us.Joe would only have told you if we had given permission. Of course,he never told us about you."

Layla shrugged. "Everybody needs a private...wait a second." Shequickly turned to me. "Who is 'us?' And where is everybody?"

"Ah, I told the others to keep out of sight for the moment. Yourappearance at the entrance was a bit abrupt."

"Didn't you tell them I was coming?"

"I forgot."

She raised an eyebrow. "You're kind of dumb, kid."

"So I've been told."

Layla walked over to a chair and sat carefully on it. "Wow," shesaid, taking another look around the Library. "So how many peoplelive down here?"

"A hundred and twelve, I think."

"Wow. Again. So I take it there is more than just what I'veseen."

"A lot more. I hope to show all of it to you soon."

"Maybe later than sooner. I...need a little time to take this allin."

"I understand."

"In fact, could you leave me alone for a second?"

"Sure."

I left the Library and went about thirty feet down the adjoiningtunnel. I stood on that spot for a few moments before I heard --

"You said that you were going to stay with her."

I turned and saw Jamie approaching me from a connecting tunnel.She still looked pissed.

"She's right there," I pointed at the Library.

"Out of your sight."

"There's nothing to worry about."

"Jacob, do you even know this woman?"

"She was an assistant for Joe. They were involved with each other.And she's been trying to find out why he was killed."

"This is what she told you?"

"Yes."

"How do you that's true? How do you she isn't working for theTower?"

"Well, if she is, then she tried to get my confidence in a funnyway, don't you think?"

"Maybe the Tower knows you're a funny person. You have to be morecareful..."

"Don't lecture me about the Tower," I snapped. "I know all aboutthe Tower. Sometimes I think I'm the only one here who takes itseriously."

"Jacob, you have no idea about..." She stopped herself and took amoment to calm down. "All I'm saying is that you should have gottenpermission first. Or at least given me a head's-up."

I grimaced. "Well, you're right there. I guess my guilt got thebetter of me."

"What do you mean?"

"A lot of people have suffered because of what I did."

Jamie's face softened. She gave me a comforting squeeze on thearm. Then she looked toward the library and back at me.

"She was really involved with Joe?"

"That's what she says."

"Huh. I'm a little surprised."

"That Joe was involved with somebody?"

"No. I'm getting a different kind of vibe from..."

Two screams exploded in the library, one right after the other.The first was full of rage and bloodthirst. The second was ignited byshock. The screams were followed by the sound of furniture beingoverturned.

Jamie and I scurried toward the library. As fast as we were, thedistance there was long enough for us to hear a new sound -- athundering roar.

I didn't recognize the source of the first scream. The secondscream sounded like Layla's. I knew without a doubt the source ofthat roar. I hadn't heard it for awhile, but my bowels still loosenedbefore its noise.

When we reached the library, Jamie had already pulled back thestring of her crossbow, armed it with an arrow and raised it in onesmooth motion. She was still too late.

Layla was sprawled on the floor. If her eyes had bulged before,then they were ready to pop out of her head now. She appearedunharmed, though.

Five feet away from her was Alexandra, but not an Alexandra I hadever seen before. She had extended her fangs and was now gnashing atthe air. The first scream had come from her throat. It contained theanger of a human, but the alien timbre of an animal. Her whole bodywas consumed by the effort of crossing those last few feet andtearing into Layla.

This was different from when she had killed Crown. Then her angerhad been calculated to scare the Nobles. It had been fed by honestemotions, but she had kept control over herself. She had no controlnow. She was driven by a pure desire to kill.

What held her back was my father. He had one hand under her chinand an arm tightened over her chest. As enraged as she was, Fatherwas too strong for her to escape.

"Be calm!" he said, a lion's growl mixed with his human voice. "Becalm, Alexandra!"

We stayed on our spots for what seemed a long time -- Layla downon the ground, Alexandra writhing in Father's hold, Jamie at theentrance with her crossbow, me just standing there stupid..

Gradually Alexandra stopped resisting Father's hold. Her fangspulled back inside her gums. She turned limp in my father's hands anddid something else I had never seen her do, despite all the sorrow inher heart.

She cried, loudly. Her chest heaved with sobs.

Jamie still kept her crossbow raised. "At ease, Jamie," Fathersaid without his lion's growl, but with no less authority. She did,but Jamie's expression was still tense.

I forced myself to kneel by Layla. I started to ask if she was allright, but she interrupted me with a question of her own --

"Who the fuck are those two?!!"

What else could I say? "That's my dad. And that's mygirlfriend."